No More Online Dating

No longer will I get log onto my computer and continue my long time routine of checking for messages from the multiple online sites that I have set up profiles. Which means, that I need to start a new online routine when I log onto the internet every day. Maybe this blog will be posted onto regularly—no promises!

            Looking back at how I’ve met people thus far, very few have come from online dating. Even in the last couple of posts on this seldom written blog, I haven’t had much interaction with guys I’ve met online, with the exception of Canada Boy (which was a couple months back anyhow).

            Time for the full disclosure of my online dating activity. The only sites that I’ve had profiles on were Adam4Adam, ManHunt, and OkCupid. The first two sites, reading exactly as they are, were for only finding a few fleeting minutes of excitement before it was out the door and no small talk. The last one of the three sites actually used for finding any meaningful relationship or at least a chance at one.

            Truth be told, I would definitely not stick to the rules of seeing a guy I’ve met via Manhunt or A4A. You’re supposed to just be able to walk in the apartment of whoever you decide to meet, get the deed done to whatever you agreed too, and walk out and continue to brunch with your friends. Well, that’s not me. I usually, message back and forth countless times, trying to get to know the person, until agreeing to finally meet up. Rule 1, already broken: Never go into details about each other lives when trying to schedule a hook up.

             It gets worse. Rule 2: Once in the apartment, get down to business. I on the other hand, talk about the décor, the books, the artifacts, or the animals, if they happen to have dogs or a cat, in one case, a mini zoo (this guy had parrots, dogs, lizards, a turtle, cats, and even a snake—maybe that’s a story for another blog?).

            Rule 3: After you’ve done the deed, get out ASAP. As they’re getting dressed, I’m catching my breath trying to figure out the rest of their scheduled day. Then it’s on to seeing if he’s available for coffee or maybe another “fling” later in the week. If you want another “stuffing” you send a quick text after work, and ask if he’s available. No need to find out anything more. This is how a hook up situation works. But not for me, because I can’t just have sex with random people and not know anything about the other person. I still think a relationship can happen even with the guy you’re screwing. Somewhat romantic, aren’t I?

            But for me now, there hasn’t been any random act of lust with anyone. It’s not that I’m in a relationship and no longer require the use of online dating sites, but I have been seeing someone and I like the way it has been going. I think it’s a good thing when you continue the routine of checking your online dating sites merely to see if you have any new messages—which I haven’t gotten anyway. But once I find out I don’t, I simply log off. I no longer stay on waiting to see my visitor list increase, or search for guys online near my location.

            Though I have been seeing someone regularly, it’s not a relationship and I don’t know where it’s going to go. He has a lot of his plate to think about, and I myself have a lot of figuring out. Yet, all I can say, is that of the people I’ve ever had a relationship with, almost all of them were met via friends, or out randomly at a gathering of some sort. No one was because of a hook up turned relationship. Not that that doesn’t happen, it does but in my life, it hasn’t happened that way yet. So, no need to continue trying. I like the idea of meeting a bookstore, coffee-shop, movies, somewhere where people used to meet people every day before we all took to the internet to plot out our lives.